Well, this is why we’re here. This is why I have permanent back damage and could sleep until next year’s Comic-Con at this point.

What do we have in store for us? RDJ intro’d the panel two years ago. Hiddleston did last year. Is James Spader going to bring on some Ultron? Are we going to see the Vision? Are we going to see the complete Phase 3 cast (Inhumans, Black Panther, IM 4, Hulk, Thor 3, Cap 3?)? Is Benedict Cumberbatch or Joaquin Phoenix Dr. Strange or is it a mystery third person (I can grow that beard, bitches)? Josh Brolin is here. Do we get a taste of Thanos?! Can I possibly adore Elizabeth Olsen any more than I already do? Will a woman or a black character get their own movie? Will Bradley Cooper show up in a garish raccoon costume? Will we somehow fit the entire Guardians of the Galaxy movie into the time slot? Will I ejaculate all over my neighbors? Stay tuned.

We’re on. Oh wait, we’re not. The audience is chanting, clapping in unison, we’re one minute away from the fucking wave.

For the record, the wave started exactly a minute later. The only time I’ve ever predicted something right this week.

Maybe the hour and a half gap before the WB TV panel will be filled merely by this panel starting so late. Which is disappointing, since I need a nap pre-Gotham.

Is a live blog truly live without me time stamping every comment? (Answer: No; but do you need to know I wrote this at 5:42:18 PM?).

Um, since when did Andy Serkis have an undisclosed role in Avengers: Age of Ultron? He’s apparently helping to mo-cap Hulk.

Eddie Ibrahim is up again.

We get an awesome recap of the entire Marvel Universe, capped with some great footage of Guardians of the Galaxy, which is going to be the best movie Marvel has made, btw (the 10th Marvel movies). Then we see Thanos in his space chair, threatening mankind. Awesome.

Kevin Feige is here, and so is Chris Hardwick of course.

Hardwick: has made a visually stunning film that’s hilarious. Big ups to James Gunn.

ANT-MAN time. Peyton Reed, the director. Paul Rudd and Michael Douglas are here (and Douglas is looking rough/awesome). Corey Stoll is here, the villain in the film: YELLOWJACKET. Playing the daughter of Hank Pym is EVANGELINE LILY as Hope Van Dyne. An interesting name choice.

This is the 20th anniversary of Peyton Reed’s first Comic-Con. Paul Rudd is popping his Comic-Con cherry, and clearly slightly overwhelmed.

Rudd is excited by challenge, thrilled to be working with such great people.

Michael Douglas admits to “popping up enough cherries.” Chris Hardwick wants to talk about that for the next hour, and so do I. Douglas has looked at Marvel from afar and has never really made a movie with the kind of technological tools this will have. Has clearly done his research: name-drops the year of Ant-Man’s creation, his creator, Stan Lee. Talks about his powers. This is the story of a heist, because his partner, Corey/Yellowjacket. Most of the budget will be removing Paul Rudd’s massive muscles.

Evangeline Lily on Hope Van Dyne: Very glad to announce it, and finally done evading press. Doesn’t have a script yet. But she is Hank Pym’s daughter, a crazy different detail from the source material. Professes love for us, been beloved in Hall H since Lost in 2005.

Corey Stoll on Yellowjacket: Was Hank Pym’s mentee, genius scientist as well. Have taken over the company, in what “judgmental people think is in an evil direction.” Attains some Pym particles (gross), and puts on a Yellowjacket suit.

Ant-Man starts filming in two weeks in Atlanta. Filmed something for us….we don’t see Paul or Michael, but we hear them, bickering about the nature of being a hero, and how Rudd isn’t a superhero, which is exactly why he’s perfect (and not a moron, like Douglas posits heroes are). We see the suit, we see ants, we see him flying on them, and get a brief glimpse at the visual flair in this movie. It’s fun.

Downey comes in a striking suit to Michael Jackson’s Don’t Stop Till You Get Enough. He throws roses from a briefcase into the crowd. Renner dances awkwardly. Mark Ruffalo comes in a little bit more unassuming. Chris Hemsworth. Cobie Smulders arrives, accepting a white rose from Downey. Samuel L. Jackson comes on, like he would. Chris Evans is buff as shit. Downey’s announcing them as they come in. Aaron Taylor-Johnson as Quicksilver. Paul Bettany as Vision. James Spader as Ultron. Elizabeth Olsen as Scarlet Witch. This is insane.

Hardwick: “This is good. This is good. This is supposed to happen. Welcome, Avengers.”

Downey: Keeps getting better, and the bench gets larger.

Renner admits to wearing pants, unfortunately. “Always thrilling, man….glad to be here. Very honored.” Never envisioned this, but is blessed.

Ruffalo is fairly flabbergasted by the love. Hulk gets the first chant. Hardwick warns the crowd not to get him excited…

Hemsworth loves being part of this madness. What has he not been able to do yet? “Turn him into a woman. Great idea. I don’t want to speak too early and jinx it, but it could be my Oscar.” Incredible.

Smulders didn’t expect this to keep going on, but hoped that. Joss brought her into the world, and “so grateful.”

Evans and Hemsworth apparently compare muscle, and Hemsworth wins (“it’s not a costume, he is Thor”). Steve is up to speed, but still looking for a place to belong. Searching for home.

Taylor-Johnson intimidated to join the group, but happy Joss wanted him in. Loves the banter, enjoys Marvel movies, and excited for a part in this one.

Bettany know has to work for his money. He used to go to a dark room for 45 minutes and walk out with a bag of cash. “The most exciting thing that has ever happened to my kids.” “They had no interest in what I did until this month.”

James Spader always thought the world could never be crazy or weirder than he thought. Until SDCC. “This place might be the weirdest, craziest place I’ve ever been.” Thanks us. “I play an 8 foot robot in this movie…and I’d always played humans up to now.” As startling and exciting as coming to Comic-Con for the first time. Everything was “so entirely new”: the process, the people, the world he was entering.

Olsen: Fun to bring magic into the world…”mutated people,” which elicits ooohs. Adds a new dynamic, not just “awesome punching.” Apparently she stares at pencils for hours trying to make it move.

Then the world explodes when Scarlett introduces the video for Avengers: Age of Ultron. Um, SPOILERS follow. A delightful party scene with the team (that also includes Maria Hill and Rhodey): everyone takes turns trying to grab Thor’s hammer, a la the sword in the stone. Tony and Rhodey try together, with their armor, to no avail. Bruce Banner tries and fakes getting excited/angry, and it’s not funny (and so funny). Steve Rogers actually makes it move, slightly, a moment that gives me a partial chub. Thor announces that none of them are worthy…and that’s when Ultron makes his appearance, agreeing, saying their existence is all that can save the world. Then he sends other Iron Man armor toward the team. Then shit goes DOWN. It looks like the apocalypse has happened. Iron Man breaks out the hulkbuster armor, and it looks INSANE. Hulk also touches hands with Black Widow. We see our first full glimpse of Ultron on his throne…and it’s exactly what you want him to look like. Ultron is going to destroy our boys. Spader’s voice is a masterstroke. We see a glimpse of Andy Serkis with a beard. He’s not just helping with mo-cap. He has a role; let the rampant speculation begin. The clip ends on the craziest note ever: Iron Man looking at the carnage around him, all of his comrades in arms, collapsed or worse, Cap’s shield BROKEN IN HALF. Boom.

Then…Josh Brolin marches into the room wearing the Infinity Gauntlet. He demands a rose from Downey, who relents, and Thanos/Brolin EATS it. The excitement is almost suffocating in this room.

The panel appears to be over, but there’s one more clip to run: Chris Pratt and James Gunn joking around in London, wondering how they’d follow an Avengers panel. They jokingly talk about telling us about Guardians of the Galaxy 2 without Kevin Feige’s say so. It’s clearly staged, but Gunn and Pratt are so lovable it works anyways. And besides, GUARDIANS is getting a sequel before it even comes out: July 28th, 2017. Fuck yes.

What’s awesome about all this, is how into it the Avengers cast is. Robert especially loves his role as ring leader and host. Everyone’s psyched to be here. We might be looking at this moment as Marvel Studios’ pinnacle…or perhaps we’re just getting started, as Elizabeth Olsen intimated, now that they’re adding magic and mutated people.

Thank you Marvel for putting on a show, and good night everybody. Gotham, The Walking Dead Escape and sweet, sweet slumber awaits.

Right now you’d be in your arm chair, a mug of beer in tow, watching the newest installment of HBO’s GAME OF THRONES. Unfortunately, you won’t be doing that this Sunday night.

GAME OF THRONES’ fourth season was probably its best yet, which is an impressive statement, since the first three seasons were essentially a bad break (or a BREAKING BAD) away from being the best show on TV (though arguments can be made for FRINGE, COMMUNITY, FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS, JUSTIFIED, THE WALKING DEAD, PARKS AND RECREATION and LOUIE within that time).

But after last season’s incredible finale, “The Children,” which may have been its best yet (and it still elicits massive doses of controversy, because internet), we’re left without the sprawling clans of Westeros and beyond fighting for power and meaningless titles on our TV sets until next March. That’s a long damn time. What the hell are we supposed to do until then? I’m not going to suggest going outside or watching the World Cup or even reading George R. R. Martin’s A SONG OF ICE AND FIRE novels, because no shit. Of course, none of my other recommendations are going to be insightful or clever either.

More than ever, people want to be apart of the discussion, they don’t want to be the only one not watching a show. This year that show has been alternately TRUE DETECTIVE, GAME OF THRONES and ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK. What’s the next obsession? Each of my following suggestions are ranked by their potential to be the next big thing.

Before I begin, I’ll offer the following advice: watch anything but CROSSBONES and DEFIANCE. I feel like this goes without saying. Watch BLACK SAILS instead if you crave pirates, because it’s STARZ’s replacement for SPARTACUS (though it’s not that good). Watch DOMINION instead of DEFIANCE if you want SyFy in your life, because that has Anthony Stewart Head in it.

10. Go see OBVIOUS CHILD

I haven’t seen the movie, but everyone I’ve talked to has said how amazing Jenny Slate is in it, and how powerful/funny/difficult a movie it is. You know Jenny Slate as Mona-Lisa in PARKS & RECREATION, also known as the worst (and simultaneously the best), and I’m tickled that this movie puts her on the dramatic map. There isn’t a movie out right now that I’m more intrigued to see. I’m guessing it’s worth the extra effort to find it.

Water Cooler Factor: 1/10. You’ll be the cool kid talking about a movie nobody’s seen, which is worth something. Unless you’re an LA hipster, I doubt OBVIOUS CHILD will make a dent in the theaters, unfortunately.

9. Catch up on ORPHAN BLACK

If you’re not watching BBC’s ORPHAN BLACK, you’re not doing it correctly. While the second season wasn’t as mindblowing or fresh as the first season, it was still the best show on TV that isn’t GAME OF THRONES (or HANNIBAL). Then last night’s season finale happened, and “Holy shit” was all I could utter after nearly every scene. It truly was a game changer; the finale changes EVERYTHING, and I’m not sure into what. Season 3 will be a complete mystery, but it promises to be no less compelling. It’s time to get onboard and learn why Tatiana Maslany really is everything.

Water Cooler Factor: 4/10. The season is over, so a lot of the impetus is gone for people to talk about it. By next year it’ll be on SHERLOCK levels, however.

8. Finally check out Showtime’s PENNY DREADFUL

I wouldn’t say I was overwhelmed by the pilot, but since then John Logan and Sam Mendes’ highly stylized, quite screwed up and grotesque take on classic gothic horror has grown into something bewitching.

I wouldn’t say it’s great, though it’s filled with great performances. Namely, the show has given an excuse for Eva Green to go absolutely bonkers, and that’s something the world has wanted/needed/craved since CASINO ROYALE. She’s deserving of at least a nomination at all of the award shows for her alluring, batshit crazy portrayal of Vanessa Ives, one of the few characters on the show that isn’t lifted directly from literature (or if it is, it’s over my head). We’ve seen way too many seances in film and TV, but Eva Green’s possessed Vanessa is the moment that secured my viewership until the show ends.

Plus, Timothy Dalton further cements his scene crunching ability in a late career renaissance I adore, and you can see Josh Hartnett’s ass and Billie Piper’s boobs. I’m an episode behind going into tonight’s episode (“Possession”), so this is one on the list that I’ll definitely be doing.

Water Cooler Factor: 5/10. I have a sneaking suspicion that a lot more people would’ve been watching PENNY DREADFUL if not for GAME OF THRONES. Now that the latter is done, there’s still some time for PENNY DREADFUL to get into the national discussion. Unfortunately, after tonight’s episode, there’s only one week till the finale. Considering Showtime has already optioned a second season, it’s another good one to get ahead of the game for next year.

7. Get onboard BBC’s next buzzy show, INTRUDERS

All I know about BBC’s INTRUDERS, except that it’s premiering this summer and stars The Master himself, John Simm, is what I gleaned from this promo:

And that’s all I need/care to know to watch it.

Water Cooler Factor: 6/10. Looks great, but in a LUTHER/IN THE FLESH kind of way, where only the in BBC crowd watches and loves it.

5. Figure out what the hell RECTIFY is about

I’ll be honest, I don’t know. But this Sundance Channel show is apparently brilliant.

EW raves about it. It’s “mesmerizing.” “Stop Everything and Go Watch Rectify.”

It certainly doesn’t sound for everyone, considering it’s referred to as subtle and quiet drama, its whodunnit beside the point. Vulture calls it “christian art.” I don’t know what that means, but I’m tantalized, especially when it’s hailed as the successor to MAD MEN.

Water Cooler Factor: 7/10. Critics and outlets are going mad for RECTIFY. Will the people follow? I kind of doubt it, based on the themes at work in RECTIFY, but I’ve bumped several shows on my list in order to start season 1 and catch up on season 2 before it ends.

4. Check out STARZ’s OUTLANDER

OUTLANDER wants to be the next GAME OF THRONES, minus the dragons (as far as I know). It’s from a best selling book series, and is a time traveling romance to Scotland, being brought to the screen by Ronald D. Moore, who rules (BATTLESTAR GALACTICA). I think this one could be huge, judging by the eighth book’s firm place on top of the NYT Best Seller’s List, and its legion of fans.

OUTLANDER premieres August 9th.

Water Cooler Factor: 8/10. It might be too dreamy and historical to catch on like wildfire, but then again, we live in an age when DOWNTON ABBEY is one of the most talked about shows.

3. FX’s THE STRAIN is the next THE WALKING DEAD/AMERICAN HORROR STORY

Based on a popular book series, check. Awesome pedigree (Guillermo del Toro), check. A new, dark take on vampires, check.

From what little we’ve seen of THE STRAIN, it looks fucked up and cool. We might all be tired of vampires, but I’m pretty sure del Toro has something different up his sleeves with this.

It’s a coming July 13th.

Water Cooler Factor: 8.5/10. When horror shows find an audience, they explode, and with AHS and TWD off the air, The Strain should fill that void. It also helps that I expect it to be fairly excellent. Bonus half point because…IT HAS SEAN ASTIN IN IT!

2. Watch HBO’s Newest Show: THE LEFTOVERS

There’s little doubt in my mind that HBO will keep the hits coming, and dominate the national pop culture discussion again, after dominating this calendar year with TRUE DETECTIVE and GOT. I don’t think it’ll be the last season of TRUE BLOOD we’ll be talking about, however. That, like DEXTER before it, is ending too late, and is really just something we’re all watching out of due diligence more than anything else.

Next Sunday, June 29th we get to see THE LEFTOVERS, the show I believe will be the next buzzy show that will get spoiled for us minutes after its episodes air. What if 2% of the world’s population mysteriously disappeared? It certainly has LOST-like potential, which sounds like a dirty word these days, but I still cling to that as a compliment. It also could very well be like UNDER THE DOME, an inconsistent show I hate-watch. Either way, I’m quite curious to check it out.

Water Cooler Factor: 9/10. Pretty positive this is the one to take the mantle.

1. Watch these summer movies: DAWN OF THE PLANET OF THE APES, GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY and SNOWPIERCER.

Movies have a very low shelf life in terms of taking over the discussion, since every week there’s a new blockbuster to watch. So far 2014’s had a pretty good track record, though we’re about to hit a bit of a lull until DOTPOTA comes out, which is an acronym I’ll avoid using in the future.

DAWN and GUARDIANS are my two most anticipated films left this summer, and probably this year, though I’m not bothering to check that. They’re also the only two I’d predict that could even touch CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER in terms of quality.

SNOWPIERCER should be incredible as long as the Weinstein’s don’t ruin it. It’s based on an acclaimed French graphic novel, it stars Chris Evans, Jamie Bell, John Hurt, Tilda Swinton, Ed Harris, Octavia Spencer, Alison Pill and comes from visionary director Joon-ho Bong. Peep it:

It’s a smaller film, but it shouldn’t be, based on that trailer and who’s involved. We will get to see a director’s cut, but the film will no longer get a wide release. The world sucks sometimes.

Water Cooler Factor: 10/10. Maybe not for SNOWPIERCER, but DAWN and GUARDIANS are the two biggest movies yet to come out so far, mark my words. Fuck Transformers.

OTHERS: Halt and Catch Fire, AMC. The Knick, STARZ. The Last Ship & Legends, TNT. The Quest, CBS.