Recently, io9.com posed the question: what’s the ultimate starship crew? To which I answered: I DON’T KNOW, and ran away crying because I didn’t want to choose between my various fictional friends. But the more I thought about it, the more I felt compelled to give it a shot. So here we go.
Every space series/movie has a different size of crew, so the first step is to decide how big to make mine. I’m going 11 deep, which is definitely a big crew, but it’s been done. My designations are mostly Trek-derived, since that’s my favorite starship universe, but the crossover in positions is clear enough. The available spots are:
Captain; First Officer; Operations/Science Officer; Helm; Tactical/Security; Chief Medical Officer; Chief Engineer; Launch Ship Pilots (2); and Ensigns/Redshirts (2). Note: yours can be as big or small and with whatever positions you want.
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Captain: Jean-Luc Picard (Star Trek: The Next Generation)
Might as well start with the toughest spot. The list of awesome starship captains is immense: James Kirk, Jean-Luc Picard, Benjamin Sisko, Malcolm Reynolds, William Adama, Jason Nesmith(/Peter Quincy Taggert), Han Solo, Kathryn Janeway, Zaphod Beeblebrox, Turanga Leela, and at least 70 other great ones I have to leave out.
I seriously considered almost every option on that list, but it came down to two. Jean-Luc Picard…
… and Malcolm Reynolds.
I hated making this decision enough that I initially gave up on this entire idea rather than choose. I also toyed with cheating and making Mal the First Officer or another position. But it felt too disingenuous. The genius of Mal is that he’s the guy in charge, as ridiculous as it can be. I just can’t imagine him constantly having to say, “Yes, sir” to Picard. It ruins his dynamic. I had to choose.
And I chose Picard. Because as much as I love the many “fun” captains out there, I wanted someone with gravitas, as well. No other captain has Picard’s blend of stone-cold poker face and ability for levity. He’s the best there is.
First Officer: Kira Nerys (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine)
The greatest First Officer ever is Spock, hands down. But Spock’s greatness came in part from the incomparable way his emotionless logic played off of Kirk’s brashness. With a more traditional leader in Picard, I don’t think Spock is a great pairing here.
So let’s go someone with a bit more of a hotheaded streak to her. Kira would challenge Picard, but still know when to back off and follow orders. And if this fictional ship ever needs her to take over, she’s a known badass.
Operations/Science Officer: Data (Star Trek: The Next Generation)
Science Officer could be its own job, but it’s often been combined with another spot. Spock was Science and First Officer in TOS, and Jadzia was Science Officer and Ops in DS9. And while TNG never had a formal Science Officer, Data often filled the role in practice; with his android brain knowledge, he’s more than qualified for almost every job on the ship, while mostly holding down Ops.
Most importantly, Data just rocks.
Helm: Hoban “Wash” Washburne (Firefly)
Wash is an incredible pilot worthy of helming the starship Dream Team. But just as importantly, he’s also hilarious comic relief.
Tactical/Security: Worf (Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Deep Space Nine)
Handling ship security and the weapons control is Worf (son of Mogh). Worf appeared in the most episodes of any Trek character and was a badass in most of them. His Klingon warrior side gives the crew a needed edge.
Chief Medical Officer: Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy (Star Trek: The Original Series)
This crew is going to be painfully light on TOS members, but even even with a deep lineup of possible doctor options, I can’t not pick McCoy. He’s the ship’s conscience and its healer, and he can cantankerously remind us of all the things he’s not:
Chief Engineer: Kaylee Frye (Firefly)
In a vacuum, I might pick Geordi La Forge for this spot. But my dream starship crew would have some gender balance, and this one quickly turned into a sausage fest before I fully noticed. But Kaylee makes the list for more than just gender equality. She’s adorable, fun, and brilliant. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted her on this particular crew over Geordi regardless of gender. Her self-taught, slightly scatterbrained genius would add an interesting dynamic to this mostly regimented crew.
Launch Ship Pilot #1: Kara “Starbuck” Thrace (Battlestar Galactica)
Trek series didn’t really do the whole smaller ships concept very often, but they were of course a vital component to BSG. And no one was better than Starbuck.
Launch Ship Pilot #2: Wedge Antilles (Star Wars)
I’m sure I might take shit for only having one Star Wars character make my team, and an ostensibly minor one at that. But Luke was really more Jedi than starship crew, so really the only other people who’d feel at home here were Han and Chewbacca. Han wouldn’t want the responsibility of captaining a serious crew like this, and Chewie didn’t have the comedic skills of Wash at pilot.
Wedge was barely in the movies, though he was the great trivia question answer to naming all the characters who appeared in the entire original trilogy, or at least he was when I was a kid in the pre-internet age. Where he really shined was in the Star Wars: Rogue Squadron book series that marked another important staple of my childhood.
Ensign/Redshirt #1: Ro Laren (Star Trek: The Next Generation)
Ro only actually appeared in eight TNG episodes, but you wouldn’t guess so few based on the love the character continues to receive from a subset of fans like me. Trek Ensigns were supposed to be obedient footsoldiers who blended into the background, but Ro was way too strong-willed to give a shit about such tradition. It would also be interesting to see her and Kira on the same crew, since Kira was originally created when actress Michelle Forbes turned down the offer to reprise Ro as a DS9 regular.
Ensign/Redshirt #2: Guy Fleegman (Galaxy Quest)
The other thing that Trek Reshirts were traditionally supposed to do? Die. So when one of my all-time favorite comedies mocked the whole Trek world, it came complete with a former extra who was terrified of being the expendable death guy again. Played by my eternal man-crush Sam Rockwell, Guy is my favorite character in the whole movie, and on this crew, he would fulfill the role that he realizes as his alternative destiny: to be the plucky comic relief. He and Wash would be incredible together.
Final Dream Lineup
Captain: Jean-Luc Picard (Star Trek: The Next Generation)
First Officer: Kira Nerys (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine)
Operations/Science Officer: Data (Star Trek: The Next Generation)
Helm: Hoban “Wash” Washburne (Firefly)
Tactical/Security: Worf (Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Deep Space Nine)
Chief Medical Officer: Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy (Star Trek: The Original Series)
Chief Engineer: Kaylee Frye (Firefly)
Launch Ship Pilots (2): Kara “Starbuck” Thrace (Battlestar Galactica) and Wedge Antilles (Star Wars)
Ensigns/Redshirts (2): Ro Laren (Star Trek: The Next Generation) and Guy Fleegman (Galaxy Quest)
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Give us YOUR dream team in the comments!
My Dream Line up
Captain: Aragorn (Lord of the Rings)(For his ability to go with the flow(switch gears quickly and easily), his ability to see the long view, and his ability to delegate).
First Officer: Remus Lupin (Harry Potter)(To be the support of the captain and crew, to have the ability to have the responsibility of the role and the chance to educate)
Ops/Science: The Doctor (Doctor Who) (The 10th Doctor, because he’s clever!)
Helm: Wil Riker (Star Trek the Next Generation)(2 words, Riker Maneuver)
Tactical/Security: Data (Star Trek the Next Generation)(7th season Data, wealth of knowledge and experience with huge processing power)
Chief Medical Officer: The EMH mark 1 (Star Trek Voyager) (The Doctor from the last season of Voyager, with his personal upgrades and mobile emitter and loads of experience of grace under pressure.)
Chief Engineer: B’Elanna Torres (Star Trek Voyager) (It was a really hard choice between B’Elanna and Miles O’Brian from TNG, for all the same qualities. Mainly the ability to fix a warp core with nail clippers and leola roots while the Borg and Hirogen battle around them. I chose B’Elanna because I needed more women in my list)
Launch Pilots(1): Corso Rigs (Star Wars the Old Republic (Scoundrel Companion)) (An excellent pilot, great at following orders right up the point it all goes to crap then he’s great at thinking on his feet. Large amount heart and desire to help and support everyone he works with)
Launch Pilots(2): Wedge Antilles (Star Wars)(For all the reasons you said)
Ensigns(1) Ro Laren (Star Trek the Next Generation)(For her ability to think on her feet and strong backbone. Also her potential, she could take on any role in the ship if needed and do the job well, if grumpily)
Ensigns(2) Han Solo (Star Wars) (Mainly chosen because of his ability to shoot first and not die(a wonderful quality for a red shirt))
The more I think about it, the more sense your lineup makes to me. While I still question whether Aragorn has the warp drive expertise needed to captain a starship, you undoubtedly put together a very strong crew. A wizard and a time lord. That should be able to overcome anything, including a captain who’s never ridden anything more advanced than a horse.
Just stumble across this. Love the idea! Here goes:
Captain: Benjamin Sisko (DS9): Close call with Picard, but I think Sisko has better people skills and communicates his concern to his people.
First Office: Mr. Spock(TOS): Any other choice would be illogical.
Pilot/Helm: Hera Syndulla (Star Wars Rebels): An ace pilot for an agile enough ship. (I insist on having an agile ship.) Plus, she has some underworld contacts for those away team missions.
Science Officer: Data (TNG): It’s almost like cheating having Data and Spock. If one of them does not know the answer to my question, then the other will. I like to stack the deck when it comes to knowledge. Knowledge is power.
Communications: Hoshi Sato (Enterprise): I wanted to give Enterprise some love, and I think she would be a good teammate to have around.
Medical: Dr. McCoy (JJ Verse): Karl Urban beats out DeForest Kelley by a few millimeters. I find him to be a bit more inventive and a bit more decisive than his predecessor.
Engineering: Scotty (JJ Verse): Like Karl Urban’s character, he is a little bit more of a man of action than in TOS. Plus, he benefited from having Spock Prime’s input early in his career. I expect this is going to pay off for him in a big way.
Security: Chewbacca. No one is messing with this away team. Plus, he’s an outstanding backup pilot for Hera.