9. iZombie: It’s a testament to the comic book TV show crop that a Rob Thomas produced show with a female protagonist is entrenched in last place. But zombie fatigue, the fact that the cool premise of a zombie gaining memories of those she eats will mostly be used as a procedural ploy for another cop show, albeit a supernatural one. Plus, the delay to midseason and its recasting doesn’t exactly leave me brimming with hope. I was intrigued to see it at Comic-Con, but it was pulled from Preview Night without an announcement, and replaced by a truly bizarre Brony episode of Teen Titans Go! (https://seveninchesofyourtime.com/sdcc-preview-night-teen-titans-go-away/). In so doing, iZombie, deserving or not, was put on my shit list.

8. Flash: Everyone is a lot more excited for this show than I am, and that’s even among people who have seen the clunky, cheesy pilot. Yes, Grant Gustin is adorable and it’ll be nice to see a show not defined by its grit and its Nolan-ness, but if the pilot is any indication, that means we’re in for Smallville 2.0. Which is fine, but I think we can all say we’ve moved past that (the bar for superhero TV has certainly risen). It’s also burdened with this holier than thou insistence on defining what a “hero” is all the time, like a re-run of Spider-Man…or Arrow (WE FUCKING GET IT). I love that they’re quickly bringing the Rogues into the picture, that Gorilla Grodd may actually happen, but I’m skeptical Wentworth Miller can pull off the Captain Cold I’ve always envisioned. He’s my favorite Rogue, by far. Casting Tom Cavanaugh and the fact that John Wesley Shipp (original Flash/THE Mitch Leary) is on the show makes me happy inside, and Flash/Arrow crossovers sound fun, and fun seems like the operative adjective for Flash. That’s not a bad thing, but I don’t know if it leaves me with particularly high expectations.

7. Gotham: It’s been labeled as the top new show by Andy Greenwald, my more talented doppelganger, and the most promising fall show by people who presumably know something (TCA). I love the idea of Ben McKenzie as Jim Gordon, and Donal Logue as Harvey Bullock is brilliant. But the show has a lot of baggage, marketing itself as a prequel to Batman, without Batman, and David’s X-Men: Evolution reference to Catwoman, Poison Ivy and Bruce Wayne made me laugh and then groan knowingly. I wish it was just Gotham Central and was on HBO.

6. Constantine: While Constantine has his die-hard fans, and the show’s been under fire for reasons David mentioned. David S. Goyer, the pinnacle of mediocrity and writer of EVERYTHING DC does explains that he still smokes, and still may be bisexual, but didn’t feel the need to show it. That’s mostly a cop out, but I also kind of bought it, in spite of myself (I at least get why they don’t want to show a hero smoking, though this kind of thing should be rectified by its late Friday night time slot). Because of these omissions, people think Constantine is gonna be lite/Diet/light Constantine, but judging by the pilot, I don’t think that’s the case. The Friday slot takes away the pressure and lets NBC dial up the crazy (but nothing as crazy as gay sex and cigarettes!). I think it’s going to be a lot like Sleepy Hollow, but less silly (and less John Noble, which is unfortunate). I liked Liv in the pilot, so it was certainly weird that she was shown the door, but if the writers mean what they say, and that they chose Zed as her replacement to quicken the pace, jump into the mythology, and pair Constantine with an equal, to avoid the chosen one/origin story/coming to grips with her power BS we’ve all seen before, then I think it’s ballsy and a breath of fresh air on the show’s part. Unlike Gotham and Flash, I think Constantine benefits from having low expectations, and could be the perfect kind of cult show to pair with Grimm.

5. Arrow: This will get me a lot of flack. I love Arrow, but I also kind of hate it sometimes, because it is so ridiculous sometimes (the island hair, the island itself, everyone’s dialogue except Felicity’s, “I will save this city,” its superhero shortcuts), and relies on the same heroic motifs over and over, slamming it into your skull like a jolt of mirakuru, another super soldier plot. I know that’s part of the mythology of Arrow and all superhero shows, but it’s exhausting. I hope the new flashback location will breathe new life into that segment of the show (and am excited to see another side of Oliver’s past), and while I’m also bummed by the Ra’s al Ghul casting, Ra’s is about the only villain this show could reasonably portray that could top Manu Bennett’s Slade Wilson at this point. I’ll always watch this show because of the characters, and John Barrowman becoming a series regular again alone is probably enough to put it in the top 3 like David did, but I’m more excited about the others.

4. The Walking Dead: TWD is one of the most well-made, beautiful shows on TV, while also being one of its most gruesome, gross and fucked up. It reaches heights in storytelling that not many shows can achieve; really it’s Game of Thrones or Hannibal that have the upside that The Walking Dead has, with its group of proto-Shakespearean actors in a philosophical dystopian sandbox. But because of this, and Kirkman’s excessively drawn out comic book in which it’s based, that TWD can be one of the most frustrating shows on TV. It becomes too slow…nothing will happen, or it feels repetitive. That’s kind of the inherent nature of a zombie apocalypse. Yet, some episodes where nothing happen are somehow the best fucking episodes of the show. Showrunner Scott Gimple is incredible with characterization and getting the ensemble to shine, and I’m excited to see the whole group back together. A new setting and situation always rejuvenates TWD, and the show is so good at presenting wonderfully interesting, exciting and terrifying arcs…but they rarely follow through on their potential, or is able to maintain their momentum. As always, I’m optimistic this season, and even if it remains up and down…it’s still a top 5 show.

3. Daredevil: This rating should have an asterisk, because I’m kind of cheating, and ranking Daredevil with a dash of what follows it: the revolutionary Netflix initiative that will feature Jessica Jones, Iron Fist and Luke Cage miniseries, following by a Hell’s Kitchen team-up called The Defenders for some reason. Probably because I want a Steve Englehart/Steve Gerberian gonzo Defenders movie with Dr. Strange, Hulk, Silver Surfer, Namor and other impossible things, I wish the crossover was called Marvel Knights or Hell’s Kitchen, or Daredevil’s Super Friends (not really), but it doesn’t lessen my excitement for what Marvel has planned here. The Netflix model is PERFECT for Marvel’s cohesive, interconnected cinematic/TV universe, and it’ll (theoretically) allow Marvel to push the envelope with some darker, more adult storytelling and themes. We could get a Daredevil series that is more Frank Miller and/or Brian Michael Bendis, hopefully taking into account Alex Maleev and David Mack’s orgasmic visual style. I have no preconceived notions of Charlie Cox, but everyone else that Marvel has hired on this project is awesome, as David mentioned. Goddard’s departure was sad, but Steven S. DeKnight has just as good a track record, with his similar Buffy and Angel roots, and the unrivaled delights of Spartacus. I tend to rank with an eye on potential rather than certainty, so this could certainly blow up in my face, but Daredevil might have the highest potential of all of these shows. Plus, if this show and the Defenders conceit is successful, we’ll surely see a Moon Knight TV show.

And hey, we agree at the top:

2. Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD: I think Marvel/ABC knows they can no longer rest on the Marvel prefix of the show’s title like much of the first season tried to do, and in spite of one of the most frustrating seasons of a show in recent memory, it somehow came away with an ensemble full of characters I care about, a TON of questions and plot avenues to explore. I think the movies will mostly stray from SHIELD and Hydra, or at least the shit that Coulson’s team will have to deal with, so I think AOS has more freedom to explore the world, one that hopefully is much more Marvel tinged. If only Peter MacNicol hadn’t signed onto CSI: Cyber and he had brought James Van der Beek along with him, to join the cast.

1. Agent Carter: See what David said. Most short season shows are better, more exciting, necessitating a tighter story, and that will behoove Agent Carter. You can’t waste any time in 8 episodes. I also think its success could promise some other fun Marvel miniseries/short shows (Cloak & Dagger). I think there’s a very real possibility we see Toby Jones as Emile Zola, which would KICK ASS, and really, I just think this show has the best chance of emulating Winter Soldier’s quality, which might be the best Marvel movie (though Guardians might be the favorite).